WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW

Vulnerabilities

A vulnerability is something about you that makes you unique. Whether it’s lived experience, where you’re from or how you interact with the world, vulnerabilities make us who we are. They can be a powerful strength when you understand them but exploiters often pick on vulnerabilities to trick you into trusting them or doing something. Take your power back by identifying yours and owning them. There is no reason to feel shame or to hide parts of yourself. So if anyone ever tries to make you feel bad about whatever it is you think isn’t “normal,” take a step back.

Grooming

Identifying

Exploiters are experts at identifying vulnerabilities. Easy targets are those with low confidence, lack of parental supervision, isolation, or previous trauma.

Building Trust

The exploiter will start a relationship to learn more about their target and uncover additional vulnerabilities. This phase frequently looks like “love-bombing” (excessive praise, gifts, attention) and is like the “get to know you” part of a relationship. This part of grooming feels great to the victim, and often deep bonds are formed here.

Filling Needs

Once the exploiter has identified what their victim needs (stable housing, money, a friend, a significant other, a parental figure, etc.) they will begin to fulfill that need. A big reason they will do this is so that the victim becomes dependent on them.

Isolation

Eventually, the exploiter will try to isolate their victim from any support systems they may have, such as parents or friends. Sometimes they will take small situations, like a fight with a friend, and blow it up into a big deal to turn their victim against that person.

Exploitation

Finally, the exploiter will eventually cross healthy boundaries and begin to exploit their victim. By the time this happens, there are often intense trauma bonds developed. Sometimes they also have information, photos, or other things to hold against their victim to force them to comply.

Consent

Understanding consent is vital in reducing the risk of exploitation or trafficking. Consent is a freely given, enthusiastic YES. An absence of saying yes is NOT consent. Talking someone into saying yes is NOT consent. Consent is also something that can be given and then taken away, you are allowed to change your mind about giving consent. Consent should be given in every situation involving your body. Whether it’s a simple hug or kiss, or if it’s something more serious like sex. Consent is everything.

Sextortion

Sextortion is the legal term for blackmail involving sexual content. The perpetrator demands sexual favors, money, or other benefits under the threat of sharing intimate or sexually explicit material or information.

Reach out if this is happening to you or someone you know. There’s no judgment, no shame, only help.

Healthy Relationships

Red flags are small signs that something may be wrong in a relationship.

When you see multiple warning signs, stop or slow down. Ask someone you trust for an outside opinion, do some research, try having an honest conversation with your partner and see if they’re willing to talk about it.

Whatever you do, value yourself and trust your gut. A feeling doesn’t need an explanation.

Can you spot the red flags in these video?

Boundaries

Personal boundaries are simply the lines we draw for ourselves in terms of our level of comfort around others

These boundaries may have to do with:

These boundaries typically fall into a few specific categories:

Click here for more information and tips for how to set your own boundaries

Safety Planning

WHAT YOU CAN DO

Don’t Contribute to the Problem

More Ways to Help…

WHERE TO LEARN MORE

Whatever you’re experiencing, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! There are so many wonderful people and organizations in the world who only want to help. Double check your sources or talk to someone who’s a trained professional to figure out what’s best for you.